By the way, on some of the pictures, if you hover your pointer over the picture, ya might find a comment from me on it, now that I've learned how to do that.
Now its time for the show to start & I think we'll start now!!!!
Students Won't Swallow ------------------
TAIWAN - While some teachers
believe in timeouts or verbal reprimanding, one educator in Taiwan felt it
necessary to en- force a much harsher punishment. After one student failed to
follow orders and crush an empty milk container before throw- ing it
away, the teacher cut it into 35 pieces and ordered each student to eat one
piece of the aluminum foil container. The students, aged 11 and 12, were
stunned and most just put the foil in their mouths without swallowing it. An
official in the city's Education Department said the teacher was
de- moted but not dismissed because she showed remorse over her conduct.
Many speculate that her new position may involve recycling.
Joy To The World, My Ticket's Gone ------------
COLUMBIA, Tenn. - Nobody
likes getting pulled over by the police for speeding. Most people will do
just about any- thing to get themselves out of a hefty fine and a mark on
their driving record. This holiday season, authorities in Tennessee are
giving speeding motorists the chance to sing their way out of trouble. The
town judge continues to follow a three-year tradition on the last court date
before Christ- mas by letting speed violators off the hook if they pipe-out
various Christmas carols. Those who sang and donated five canned goods
to the Harvest Food Share had their tickets dismissed with no points put on
their driving record. No report was released on otherways to get out of
traffic tickets.
A pirate captain was out to retrieve his buried treasure. After months of
hard sailing his ship caught site of land, the land to which his treasure
map had been leading. He and his first mate disembarked on the island to
search out the buried treasure, which was supposed to lie hidden deep
with- in a swamp at the center of the island.
Sure enough, at the
center of the island was a swamp, and the Captain and his first mate bravely
entered the swamp. Soon the swamp began to get deeper, and the pirate's
feet, then ankles, and finally entire leg below the knees was covered in
swamp. It was at that time that the Captain banged his shin against
something hard. He reached down, searched around, and pulled up a treasure
chest.
Prying the lock open, the chest revealed gold and jewels
beyond imagination. The Captain turned to his first mate and said,
"Arrrr, matey, that just goes to show ye, that booty is only shin deep!"
If your skillet or pots have burnt food in them, add a few drops of dish soap
and enough water to cover the burnt level. Place the skillet or pt on the
stove and bring to a boil. Simmer a minute or two. It will clean up much
easier now...
When a cake recipe tells you to grease and flour a pan, use a little of the
cake mix instead. You won't get that white coating of flour on the cake when
you take it out of the pan.....
Fear not the path of truth for the lack of people walking on it. --Arab
proverb
May those whose holy task it is to guide impulsive youth, fail not to cherish
in their souls a reverence for truth; for teachings which the lips impart
must have the source within the human heart… --Charlotte Forten
Grimke
Bonus Quote
In an age of universal
deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act. --George Orwell
NUTRITIONAL ADVICE: NEITHER FEAST NOR FAST DURING HOLIDAYS
Overeating
during the holidays is a favorite guilty pleasure, but one you need not
indulge in to have a festive time, nutri- tionists advise. Registered
dietitian Suzanne Henson of the University of Alabama, Birmingham, EatRight
Weight Management System says some simple menu adjustments can cut calories
from your holiday feast without making it into a fast. She advises
substituting reduced-fat items when possible and/or reducing quantities.
"Simply using two egg whites in place of one whole egg when appropriate or
cutting the amount of butter in a re- cipe from six tablespoons to four can
make a major difference," Hansen said. Gravies, dressings and dishes such as
sweet potato casserole are good places to cut fat and calories, she added.
TIPS ON SAFE INDOOR TANNING
Summertime may have come and gone, but
sunbathers continue to tan indoors -- and they need to take precautions as
they would outside, researchers say. Whether bronzing the skin at a
tanning salon, health club or even a video store with tan- ning beds, it is
important to follow some basic safety rules to prevent sunburn, scientists
said. When done responsibly, indoor tanning has many benefits and, according
to recent re- search, may actually help prevent some forms of cancer. Just
as with exercise, care must be taken to increase the tan grad- ually and
not overdo it. It is important to choose a profes- sional facility, to
understand the industry's guidelines and to avoid overexposure or any degree
of sunburn. To maintain a tan, people with a good base tan from outdoor
sunning can take one to two weekly sessions at 48-hour minimum intervals.
The type of skin will determine the schedule, experts advise. Skin types
range from a Skin Type I (albino) to Skin Type VI (Afri- can-American). Most
people using indoor tanning systems are a skin type II, III or IV. A
person's skin type and the amount of base tan should always be displayed on
the tanning bed. The salon attendant should: discuss skin types and exposure
time charts; recommend a tanning schedule that will produce a mod- erate
tan in successive stages; discuss medications that may have a potentially
photosensitizing effect when combined with UV exposure; provide approved
eyewear with instructions on use; explain the cleaning procedures of the
tanning beds between sessions. Beds should be cleaned after each
session.
STUDY EYES CUSTOM VISION CORRECTION
Two studies have begun of customized
laser vision correc- tion, which sculpts the cornea. Dr. Scott MacRae,
professor of ophthalmology and visual science at the University of
Rochester Medical Center, will enroll up to 120 patients interested in
laser vision correction. The procedure has allowed hundreds of thousands of
patients worldwide to toss out their glasses or contact lenses. MacRae will
look at a unique form of the surgery known as "customized ablation," a
new technique that allows doctors to precisely tailor the surgery to
compensate for imperfections deep within the eye. Eventually, MacRae plans
to include 750 patients. Doctors will compare conventional laser vision
correction to the customized version. Such studies are crucial to making the
procedure safer, and making sure that people benefit as much as possible
from the procedure, MacRae said. "With the latest technology used in our
research studies, many patients today see better than doctors thought was
possible just 10 years ago," MacRae said. "As more and more doctors begin
doing these procedures for patients, it's crucial that we discover what
works best for patients, and who is appropriate for the procedure and who is
not." Persons interested in participating can call 585-273-2020.
MEMORY TRAINING MAY HELP SOME ALZHEIMER'S PATIENTS
Memory training can
help some people with early-stage Alzhei- mer's disease to sharpen their
recall and reduce disability, researchers say. The study is published in the
journal Neuro- psychology. "There is a good deal that can be done to improve
well-being of Alzheimer's patients," said lead researcher Linda Clare of
University College London. Clare's team studied the training in 12 patients
with mild Alzheimer's who still had a capacity for learning. The researchers
trained the participants to remember the names of people whom they had
difficulty naming from a set of 12 photos. They used such memory aids as
mnemonic devices, which use the image to jog memory through meaningful
association; "vanishing cues," a method in which participants fill in
more and more letters in the name until they can come up with the correct
one; nd "expanding rehearsal," in which people test themselves on what
they've learned, in spaced in- tervals over time. All training methods
minimized the chance of errors. The memory training produced a significant
improv- ement in group performance on free recall of trained items.
Participants kept their memory gains six months after training, and
improved memory was noted even a year later. The results suggest doctors
could design programs to help people hang on to their memory gains through
ongoing new learning, scientists said. "These methods could be applied very
effectively by non- professionals such as friends, volunteers and family
members," Clare said.
DEALING WITH CANCER DURING THE HOLIDAYS
A support network for women with
cancer has produced a bro- chure to help mothers with cancer cope with the
stresses of the holiday season. "When Mom Has Cancer: Help & Hope for
the Holidays" is available online at gillettecancerconnect. org. Nearly
250,000 women were diagnosed with breast and gyn- ecologic cancers in the
United States this year, and their first Christmas with the disease may be
especially difficult, both emotionally and physically, researchers said. The
program from the Gillette Women's ancer Connection offers tips on how to
minimize the stress experienced by moms and their families during this time
of year. "Traditionally, holidays are the time of year when many mothers eel
the need to turn into 'SuperMom'," said Dr. Ursula Matulonis, gynecologic
cancer specialist at Dana-Farber Cancer Institute and Brigham and
Women's Hospital. "If they are undergoing cancer treatments or
struggling emotionally, many tasks such as shopping, bak- ing and decorating
may be overwhelming or impossible. We want women to give themselves
permission to decide which activities are right for them this year and feel
empowered to control the way they and their families celebrate the
holidays." Here are some holiday tips for women with cancer: be true to
yourself, and express your feelings penly; set realistic expectations to
avoid becoming overwhelmed; be flexible and fluid, and don't strive for
perfection or try to make this the most elaborate holiday you've ever had;
lighten up, and ease up; don't fear "the meal," and consider a potluck or
dinner at a restaurant; go cyber, and do your shopping online; get out for a
fun out- ing or weekend getaway; break with tradition or create new
traditions that aren't quite as demanding of your time and energy; be a
little selfish, and spend some time with your- self; ask for help, and accept
it graciously when it is offered.
STUDY EYES ENVIRONMENTAL FACTORS IN AUTISM
University of California,
Davis, researchers are launching the first major study of genetic and
environmental factors in autism. The epidemiological study of up to 2,000
California children ages 2 to 5 also will look at how heredity and
envir- onment affect mental retardation and developmental delay in
children. Recruitment will continue over the next three years to
incorporate newly diagnosed children. The study is one of three projects
within the UC Davis Center for Children's Envi- ronmental Health and Disease
Prevention, created last fall with grants from the National Institute of
Environmental Health Sciences, the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency and
the M.I.N.D. Institute at UC Davis. The center is the first to look at
severe impairments of social behavior related to genetic and environmental
factors. "Most importantly, our researchers will be tackling how genes
and environmental factors interact," said Isaac Pessah, the center
director and professor of molecular biosciences at UC Davis School of
Veterinary Medicine. "It's clear that genes play a role in autism and
developmental delay, but evidence suggests that the environment is also an
important factor," said Irva Hertz-Picciotto, professor of epidemiology and
preventive medicine at UC Davis School of Medicine and Med- ical Center.
"By studying a large number of children with different types of development,
we expect to gain a better understanding of the multiple ways autism and
other develop- mental delays may
occur."
------------------------------------------------------------
Questions... Comments... email us at: mailto:health@shagmail.com <a
href="mailto:health@shagmail.com">Email
Health Tips</a>
************************************************************
With "Chicago" coming on the
heels of her own "Moulin Rouge," Nicole Kidman figures the movie musical is
back for good. Kidman, who earned an Academy Award nomination for last
year's musical "Moulin Rouge," recently caught a screening of the
zestful film adaptation of the stage hit "Chicago" and came away
convinced that the long-neglected genre has a good future.
"I think it's
made its comeback, and now it's here to stay," Kidman told The Associated
Press in an interview to promote her new film, "The Hours." "It's been
proven that there is definitely an audience for musicals, and it's a genre
we miss."
Once a staple in Hollywood, musicals have generally been out
of favor over the last 30 years.
"Chicago" stars Renee Zellweger,
who co-stars with Kidman in next year's "Cold Mountain." Richard Gere and
Catherine Zeta- Jones co-star in "Chicago," set largely in a jail where two
women compete for headlines after the seamy murders of their lovers.
PEE-WEE HERMAN TO FIGHT CHARGES
Paul Reubens is going to
fight court charges of possession of so-called "kiddie porn." He is, of
course, best-known for his portrayal of the ever-childlike Pee-Wee Herman.
According to court records in Los Angeles and published reports, the
50-year-old comedian sent a "not guilty" plea to the charges to a local
court on Wednesday. The plea was voiced by his lawyer. Meanwhile, Reubens is
out on $20,000 bail. If con- victed he could face a year in a county jail and
be fined $2,500. Police arrested Reubens after getting a search warrant
and checking the contents of his home. At the time of his arrest, his
lawyer noted that his client had no knowledge of how the items got into his
house ... if they were there. Additionally, Reubens says that he is the
victim of a smear campaign aimed at ruining his career.
FUNNY HOW?
Billy Crystal isn't surprised to
see how funny Robert De Niro can be. Crystal, who co-stars with De Niro in
the comedy "Analyze That" the sequel to 1999's "Analyze This" said he knew
the Oscar-winning actor could play neurotic mob boss Paul Vitti.
"Even in some of the darker movies, there was always a laugh in some
of the characters," Crystal told reporters recently. "There was a lot of
humor in `Raging Bull.'"
De Niro, 59, won a supporting-actor Oscar in
1975 for playing young gangster Vito Corleone in "The Godfather Part II" and
a best-actor Oscar in 1981 for his portrayal of boxer Jake La Motta in
"Raging Bull."
The 54-year-old Crystal reprises his role as twitchy
psycho- therapist Ben Sobel in "Analyze That."
"It's hard with the
second one after the first one is so successful and such a good, I believe,
and well-liked movie, to make the story good and the characters good in that
why would people come again, why would they care again about us. So it
took a long time until we all felt satisfied with it," Crystal said.
Need some Recipes or some "Bonehead of the day" or even some "Didya Know" Stuff ?
Then Click on this file link &
it will take ya where ya can find all the back articles that I have kept for ya.
You have to read this one. All mothers and
teachers will get a kick out of this one ...
Betsy, a grammar-school
teacher from Miami, remembers this Oscar-worthy birth tableau from one of her
students... I've been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two kids
myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second-grade
class room a few years back. When I was a kid, I loved show-and-tell. So I
always have a few sessions with my students. It helps them get over shyness and
experience a little public speaking. And it gives me a break and some guaranteed
entertainment. Usually, show-and-tell is pretty tame. Kids bring in pet
turtles, model airplanes, pictures of fish they catch, stuff like that. And I
never, ever place any boundaries or limitations on them. If they want to lug it
to school and talk about it, they're welcome. Well, one day this little
girl, Erica, a very bright, very outgoing kid, takes her turn and waddles up to
the front of the class with a pillow stuffed under her sweater. She holds up a
snapshot of an infant. "This is Luke, my baby brother, and I'm going to tell
you about his birthday. First, Mommy and Daddy made him as a symbol of their
love, and then Daddy put a seed in my mother's stomach, and Luke grew in there.
He ate for nine months through an umbrella cord." She's standing there with
her hands on the pillow, and I'm trying not to laugh and wishing I had a video
camera rolling. The kids are watching her in amazement. "Then, about two
Saturdays ago, my mother starts going, 'Oh, oh, oh!'" Erica puts a hand
behind her back and groans. "She walked around the house for, like an hour,
"Oh, oh, oh!'" Now the kids' doing this hysterical duck-walk, holding her back
and groaning. "My father called the middle wife. She delivers babies, but
she doesn't have a sign on the car like the Domino's man. They got my mother to
lie down in bed like this." Erica lies down with her back against the wall.
"And then, pop! My mother had this bag of water she kept in there in case he
got thirsty, and it just blew up and spilled all over the bed, like psshhheew!"
The kid has her legs spread and with her little hands is miming water
flowing away. It was too much! "Then the middle wife starts going push,
push, and breathe, breathe. They start counting, but they never even got
past ten. Then, all of a sudden, out comes my brother. He was covered in
yucky stuff they said was from the play-center, so there must be a lot of stuff
inside there." Then Erica stood up, took a big theatrical bow and returned
to her seat. I'm sure I applauded the loudest. Ever since then, if it's
show-and-tell day, I bring my camcorder - just in case another Erica comes
along.
Little Red Riding Hood is skipping down the road
when she sees a big bad wolf crouched down behind a log. "My, what big eyes
you have, Mr. Wolf." The wolf jumps up and runs away. Further down the
road Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again and this time he is crouched
behind a bush. "My what big ears you have, Mr. Wolf." Again the wolf jumps up
and runs away. About two miles down the road Little Red Riding Hood sees the
wolf again and this time he is crouched down behind a rock. "My what big teeth
you have Mr. Wolf." With that the wolf jumps up and screams, "Will you knock
it off, I'm trying to poop!"
In the beginning...
In the beginning God populated the earth with broccoli and
cauliflower and spinach, and green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds,
so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
Then using God's
great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's and Krispy Creme. And Satan said,
"You want chocolate with that?" And man said "Yea." and woman said, "And another
one with sugar sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds.
And God created
the healthful yogurt that woman might keep the figure that man found so fair.
And Satan brought forth white flour combined them. And woman went from size 2 to
size 6.
God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan presented
Thousand-Island Dressing and garlic toast on the side. And man and woman
unfastened their belts following the repast God then said, "I have sent you
heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them."
And Satan
brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own
platter. And man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof.
God then brought running shoes so that his children might lose those extra
pounds.
And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not
have to toil changing the channels. And man and woman laughed and cried before
the flickering light and gained pounds.
Then God brought forth the
potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition. And Satan peeled off
the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried
them. And man gained pounds.
God then gave lean beef so that man might
consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created
McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with
that?" and man replied, "Yea! And super size 'em."
And Satan said "It is
good." And man went into cardiac arrest. God sighed and created quadruple bypass
surgery.
And Satan created HMO
What I Want in a Man,
Original List
1. Handsome 2. Charming 3.
Financially successful 4. A caring listener 5. Witty 6. In good
shape 7. Dresses with style 8. Appreciates finer things 9. Full of
thoughtful surprises 10. An imaginative, romantic lover
What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 32)
1. Nice looking
(prefer hair on his head) 2. Opens car doors, holds chairs 3. Has enough
money for a nice dinner 4. Listens more than talks 5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease 7. Owns at least one tie 8.
Appreciates a good home-cooked meal 9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries
10. Seeks romance at least once a week
What I Want in
a Man, Revised List (age 42)
1. Not too ugly (bald head OK) 2. Doesn't
drive off until I'm in the car 3. Works steady - splurges on dinner out
occasionally 4. Nods head when I'm talking 5. Usually remembers punch
lines of jokes 6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture 7.
Wears a shirt that covers his stomach 8. Knows not to buy champagne with
screw-top lids 9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down 10. Shaves most
weekends
What I Want in a Man, Revised List
(age 52)
1. Keeps
hair in nose and ears trimmed 2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public 3.
Doesn't borrow money too often 4. Doesn't nod off to sleep when I'm venting
5. Doesn't retell the same joke too many times 6. Is in good enough
shape to get off couch on weekends 7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh
underwear 8. Appreciates a good TV dinner 9. Remembers your name on
occasion 10. Shaves some weekends
What I Want in
a Man, Revised List (age 62)
1. Doesn't scare small children 2.
Remembers where bathroom is 3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep 4.
Only snores lightly when asleep 5. Remembers why he's laughing 6. Is in
good enough shape to stand up by himself 7. Usually wears some clothes
8. Likes soft foods 9. Remembers where he left his teeth 10.
Remembers that it's the weekend
What I Want in
a Man, Revised List (age 72)
1. Breathing 2. Doesn't miss the toilet
& here is a great PPs file for your viewing pleasure BLESSED Hope ya enjoy !
& now your at the end of the letter, I hope that you enjoyed !
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